Men . . . We need to find, again, our proper place in the world

“If I were a girl, I’d despair. The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve them.” – Robert Graves

Graves was writing in the early years of the last century, but his words still ring true. A huge backlash, call it the "Me Too" Movement, or whatever, has opened the world's eyes to the abusive conceit and deceit of far too many in the male gender.

Even those of us who can rightfully assert that we've always held women in high regard, never looked for reasons to marginalize them, who always believed that the long-hallowed notion of patriarchy was a social construct of diminished relevance, ready for the dust heap of history, find it hard to escape censure.

Recently I posited on Facebook my opinion, as a longtime progressive Democrat and something of a "political wonk," that Hilary Clinton was manifestly unsuitable to be the Democratic Party's standard-bearer in the 2016 presidential election. I thought that despite her undoubted ability and record of accomplishment, she carried very high "negatives" into the election, and that possibly, her own ambition to equal her husband probably clouded her judgment. I believed that had the Democratic Party chosen instead a white male, of which there were a number of suitable candidates, we would not have lost so much of the white male electorate -- much of which had long voted the Democratic ticket -- and we could have defeated Donald Trump. For this string of insights and opinion, this tactical judgment about how our party might have avoided loss in the last election, I was castigated by a longtime friend, a woman (and a pastor), who believed that expressing such an opinion marked my inherent sexism. In vain did I argue that this was a purely tactical political judgment based on analysis of the election results. I had no doubt that Mrs. Clinton would have made an effective President, but her candidacy was too much of a risk, given her high "negatives" and the increasing polarization of the American electorate. No, my opposition was put down to sexism, pure and simple.

So we now have a white male President who flaunts his misogyny, counterbalancing a long string of prominent men who have been forever tarred with abusive misogyny, sexism, and patterns of sexual discrimination that have driven them from public favor into disgrace. For the rest of us, who believe we are truly "good guys" who respect women as equals (if not our superiors, in many cases), to whom should we point as examples of the proper values?

Well, for a start, as a guy of "a certain age" I can point to John Wayne. Yes, the "Duke," who in his films time and time again exemplified the toughest of manly men and at the same time the respecter and protector of women. His screen characters were never promiscuous, never adulterers, they invariably showed respect and, yes, love for women.

So, listen you assholes, you "incels" who somehow think you are entitled to have sex with attractive women, you serial adulterers, you perpetuators of the "old boys clubs" who link arms to keep women outside the circle of influence -- your day is past! Don't look to me for gender solidarity! Because I have nothing but contempt for you and all you stand for. As would my childhood screen idol and role model, John Wayne.